Many people contact me to learn about options in divorce (or after), and receive answers to their “what if’s”, but then don’t want to pursue the matter. Such things as knowing that there are problems with visitation (Changing visitation), child support (Changing Support), or custody, and you know that the other side is complaining, or making threats about the problem.
You have the option to actually file the appropriate motions and seek changes or clarification of the issues; and, if the other side is threatening to hold you in contempt be proactive is bring the problem to the court first — before the other side files pleadings telling the court how nasty you are in your failure to comply with the letter of the orders because those orders no longer work. Enforcing Orders
A recent example: A couple, with children, are divorced. The custodial parent moves with the children, thereby affecting the other parent’s visitation. Sure, the other parent starts complaining, making nasty phone calls to you, and threatens to take custody away if you don’t meet all of that other person’s demands. Plus, you actually are technically in violation of the current visitation orders because of the distance — but the other person also refuses to discuss, let alone assist with, transportation.
Instead of waiting for the other side to take you to court screaming that you are a nasty horrible person and that you should be held in contempt and have to pay the other’s sides attorney fees, why not simply present the matter to the court, with your ideas on how to fix the problem? Let’s face it, if you go to the judge and say that some part of the orders is not working and have an idea of how to fix that problem, wouldn’t the judge think you to be a responsible parent? On the other hand, if the other side gets in there, with all of the complaints and nasty words, isn’t the judge going to look at you a bit cross-eyed?
Be proactive. Handle problems when they are small. And don’t let the other side bully you into agreeing to anything you don’t understand or agree with.